Wedding Etiquette: For the Father of the Groom's Girlfriend
During the 1800 to 1900, the wedding etiquette is that the father of the groom's girlfriend should pay for the wedding expenses. Everything that has to be paid should be paid by the father of the groom's girlfriend.
This was the wedding etiquette before because it is the father of the groom's girlfriend who will decide on everything that her daughter should do, including approval of the man she would marry, the date of the marriage, and how her marriage should be celebrated.
You may now ask, why was it that girls agree to this wedding etiquette and allow their father to decide for themselves? Is this wedding etiquette still applicable up to this time?
This wedding etiquette was not being questioned during those times. Any decision by the father of the groom's bride is always respected. Even the bride themselves did not think that they were being oppressed. They thought and believe that they were being taken care of fully.
During those times, the father of the grooms bride feed his daughter, took care of her and brought her to lady manners school to learn and practice the right way of socializing, dressing, and speaking. Every teenage daughters in a middle to upper class families were required to attend finishing schools. This was done to teach the bride the proper wedding etiquette and to ready her for the life of a married lady.
So, when the father had decided that her daughter was ready to get married, he will announce his daughter's debut and would held a party for her to announce her coming of age. All suitors would be, of course, under the father's scrutinizing eye. He will only accept suitors that he thinks could feed and take care of her daughter.
If the father has chosen the suitor of his choice and his daughter agrees, the engagement will be announced.
Because of wedding etiquette, the father of the groom's bride won't ask a single penny from the father or parents of the groom. The father of the groom's bride should have saved enough money to celebrate the wedding of his daughter in the way her daughter wants it and the way he, the father, wants it to be held.
So, if he wants an extravagant and festive wedding celebration complete with ball, he should save have saved money the moment he learnt that her child is a she.
Today, however, things have changed. Because of high cost of living and that the brides are not too dependent on their father or parents and are earning their own money as well, the wedding etiquette has bent slightly. Although the modern wedding etiquette does not stop the father of the groom's girlfriend to pay for the wedding, he is not compelled to refuse the help of the groom's parents or their desire to co-host the wedding.
Getting married these days is very costly and it requires a great fortune on the part of the father of the groom's girlfriend. Everyone can contribute to the wedding, financially and of services.
The modern wedding etiquetted does not oblige or compel the father of the groom's girlfriend to shoulder the entire wedding expenses, most especially if he now has a new family and young children that he needs to feed. The traditional wedding etiquette, the father of the groom's girlfriend paying for the wedding cost, may still be done these days only by fathers with great fortune. Daughters should be understanding enough of these situations.
In fact even the groom and her girlfriend can finance their own wedding without the help of their parents. With couples these days preparing their wedding ahead, a year or two, they can have an ample time to save cash for their wedding.
But if the father of the groom's girlfriends has decided to co-host the wedding, the bride and the groom should be sensitive of their feelings and should accept the offered help. Parents want to be part of the most special day of their child and we should not deny them in satisfying themselves by helping out cover some wedding costs.
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Weddings Brings Back The Love For Divorced Parents
Dealing with divorced parent in a wedding can be tricky and complicated. While coping with the situation will be stressful particularly for the brides, having a beautiful wedding despite having divorced parents is never impossible.
Divorced parents of the bride or groom should participate in the wedding ceremony. In addition, they also to the rehearsal dinner even if they will likely act horribly. Not inviting the parents will create more trouble. The parents may or may not have to host the rehearsal dinner, which is supposedly one of the most relaxing portions of the wedding process.
Indicating in an Invitation
- The name of the mother is the first written then followed by the father. The word “AND” cannot be used between the names.
- The names of the mother and stepfather can be written in the invitation if the father has not been involved in the life of the bride or groom since she/he was a baby.
- The individuals whose names are appearing on the invites do not have to be always the ones paying for the wedding despite popular belief.
Sharing in costs
The couple should consider opening a checking account that will solely contain expenses for the wedding. The divorced parents should be asked on how much they can contribute. It is advisable to ask a check for a lump sum that will be deposited to the wedding account in order to make the money easily accessible whenever it is needed.
Seating arrangement
If the divorced parents are not speaking with each other, it is advisable that the two should be seated apart from the each other. One of them might be attending with someone the other parent cannot be comfortable with. Etiquette dictates that mother and stepfather occupy the first row, while father and stepmother sit on the second row.
However, the divorced parents can be seated with each other if they are on good terms but will likely have to stay in different areas during the reception.
No families are the same, as each has different problems and scenarios that affect relationships. Communication is the most important way to keep relationships strong. The couple have a responsibility of keeping the divorced informed about the progress of the wedding and they should also be given a chance to contribute. Never compare the behaviour of one parent to another, as this could result in conflict.
A wedding ceremony follows certain etiquette in order to make the occasion flow seamlessly.
- In a semi-private wedding, bridesmaids and groomsmen should perform certain responsibilities in assisting the bride and groom.
- The bridesmaids should obviously be younger than the bride and their outfils should complement each other. The dresses of the bridesmaids can include more ornaments and composed of light and graceful fabric. Flowers should serve as the main decoration.
- The wedding gown should be very simple but can be combined with few jewels or ornaments coming from the parents or groom. The most attractive part of the dress should be the garland and veil.
- The bridesmaids should help the bride in wearing the wedding gown and attending to guests. Bridemaids should position themselves at the bride’s left side during the ceremony. The first bridesmaid should be responsible in keeping the bouquet and gloves.
- Bridesmaids can be positioned from the tallest to the shortest from the couple in order to be symmetrical. A bridesmaid and groomsman with similar height can be paired with each other.
- The groomsmen are assigned to receive the clergyman and then lead him to the couple. They should be positioned groom’s right side during the wedding ceremony.
Ceremony in Church
The bride enters from the left side walking with her father followed by her bridesmaids. The groom enters the room from the right and is followed by his groomsmen. The parents come from behind the entourage, while the attendants can stand from either side.
The glove of the bride does not need to be snug, as it will be taken off later in the ceremony. In addition, the ring should be placed where the groom can easily see it to avoid delaying the ceremony.
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A Western Flare For Your Wedding
Applying a western theme to you wedding is a sure way to make that special occasion a truly memorable. From country music to cowboy hats, this theme is designed to make your gets feel like they are back in the old wild west and party all night screaming “Yee-haw”!
A western wedding also means that parts of the ceremony will be made outdoors. Ideal locations include parks and back yards. A mountainous area will make a perfect back drop if you live in the West. If not, other locations to hold your western wedding include an old barnhouse, grange hall or dance hall.
Watching some western movies will help give you an idea on what you should be wearing. Based on wedding etiquette, the bride can wear a Victorian dress if you truly want that Old West look. For a more contemporary look, go for lace or denim. The cowboy can be decorated with a cowboy hat with a little touch of craft glue.
The groom can wear cowboy boots, hats and bolo ties. Western ornaments can be found in antique shops and flea market. These can be used as decoration. Ask the bridesmaids and groomsmen to look for such items in order to get themselves acquainted.
Using a horse is a nice way to add some serious spice to a western wedding. The bride and groom can each ride a horse and can even express their vows while on horseback. If possible, rent a horse-and-carriage to ride away from the ceremony afterwards. The could should make a list western music they would like to play during the festivities.
Country artists that can be considered include Johnny Cash, Randy Travis, Lyle Lovett, Emmylou Harris, Tammy Wynette and the Dixie Chicks.
A special wedding CD can be given to guests if you feel generous. Each time they listen to the music they will remember your special day.
Western delicacies can also be serves and cooking them during the even itself will give guests a taste of the West. An open-pit barbecue is advisable, and will release a hickory scent. Coleslaw, baked potato and beans can go with the barbecue.
During the evening, a nice warm bonfire can be used to toast marshmallows and skewers from the cowboys and cowgirls chilling around.
Cowboy Hats For Weddings
NATURAL MULTI TAN ROLLED EDGE BRIM CASUAL COWBOY HAT
Simple hat has matching colors flowing throughout it's weave. Soft and pliable to the touch because of its poly braids. Continuous use of the hat helps improves its condition. Can be easily shaped and ideal for staying at the beach, shopping, sporting events or any casual outings.
Size One size fits most
Special Features Grosgrain sweatband
Brim Size (approx). 3.5" inches at widest point
Circumference (approx).22" inches
Colors within this hat Tan with beige stripes, crème and yellow
Material 100% Polyester
Origin Imported
Peter Grimm Drifter Straw Cowboy Hat
This cowboy hat for weddings is made of Flat Morocca Straw. Features an Elastic Sweatband for moisure-wicking and comfort. Has metal eyelets and the hat has a Pre-curved Brim for ultimate comfort. The Brim has a flexible wire inside making it simple to shape. This hat is similarly designed like the well-known Shady Brady, but not as expensive.
TAN & GOLD BENDED BRIM AMBER BEADED BAND COWBOY HAT
A cowboy hat for glitz and shimmer. A metallic embossed blended paper braid shapeable cowboy hat. Ideal for those that lounge around the beach or a concert or clubs. This hat is designed with an attractive faux amber and antiqued gold ornate chain, which dangles off the back to make it more beautiful.
ARDEN B LILAC STRAW COWGIRL SEXY
This attractive hat from Arden B is created with of knit straw and dye giving it that somewhat worn out look. Comes with folded sides and elastic to help fit most head sizes.
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The Right Way to Dress: Wedding Etiquette for Clothing
In our modern society, no one would care if you break a small rule or bend some rules to make accommodate your wishes. And this also applies to wedding ettiquette + clothing. You can break some wedding etiquette rule according to your wishes.
Although old and traditional rules have now been modified, you should learn the basic wedding etiquette on clothing before you bend some and break some.
Below are some guide for you, bride-to-be, on wedding etiquette + clothing:
Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Bride
Traditionally the bride wears white. This is said to signify virginal purity and innocence. But these days there's a slight changes in wedding etiquette on clothing for bride. Brides are now allowed to wear a variation of white, such as ivory, creme, and pale pastel colors to match the wedding's color motif.
For a widow bride who will wed for the second time, the tradition is for a bride to wear lilac or lavander. However, modern brides don't follow this tradition faithfully. Even ministers and priests allow widow brides to wear wedding dress that they feel appropriate. In fact modern wedding etiquette + clothing on widow bride is cream or ivory colored wedding dress.
For a church wedding, brides are asked to wear formal and more traditional wedding dress. The old wedding etiquette on clothing for church wedding has been kept for centuries although the church do allow creme colored wedding dress and a tube and low back style wedding dress as long as the shoulders are draped with semi-transparent cloth or the veil covers it.
With wedding that will be held at the registry office or which is more know as the civil wedding ceremony, brides are allowed to wear any wedding dress that they like. Simple evening dress may do, even your regular working clothes may do. With civil wedding ceremony, the rule on wedding etiquette + clothing do not apply.
Of course, if you want to avoid cringing at your photograph when people look at it or if you yourself look at it in the future, don't try to wear a wedding dress that don't look good at you. Forget the wedding etiquette on clothing, just follow the few good teachings of street smart sensibilities. Extreme fashion didn't look good yesterday and won't look good today and tomorrow.
The wedding etiquette on clothing if the bride is formally dressed, the rest of the wedding party and wedding guests should be formally dressed.
-- Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Groom
The traditional wedding etiquette on clothing for the groom, the male members of the family and the groomsmen should wear morning dress. For evening weddings the modern wedding etiquette on clothing for groom is Tuxedo and black bow tie. For civil ceremonies, groom may wear suit or match the dress theme of his bride. If his bride will sport a summer look, he should wear a soft, flowing, linen polo and beige cotton pants to match his bride's summer get-up.
-- Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Bridesmaids
Wedding etiquette on clothing for bridesmaid dictates that bridesmaids should wear any dress that the bride chooses for them. However, bridesmaids may choose to dress differently with each other. It is acceptable that bridesmaids have different dress the designs. The only thing that they should maintain is the color of the dress. They should wear the same color, the color that the bride requires.
-- Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Male Attendants
Ushers and best man cannot choose the dress that they want. They will dress the same as the groom. If the groom wears a morning dress or a tuxedo and a black bow tie, then so will they.
-- Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Immediate Family
Any close family will dress formally. The two mothers, that of the bride and the groom, must not both wear dress of the same color, while the fathers wear any dress that the groom chooses. The choices, however, is just between black tie and morning dress.
-- Wedding Etiquette on Clothing for Guests
The invitation speaks what guests should wear. A formal invitation requires them to wear a formal attire. Modern wedding etiquette on clothing for guests has allowed male guests to wear black tie even if the wedding is a bit informal. For the female guests, they are now allowed to wear evening dress to match their partner's black tie.
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In Your Honor: The Maid Of Honor
The task of selecting the Maid of Honor is one of the most difficult decisions that has to be made by the bride. The complexity is due to the fact that the duties of the Maid are normally not defined and typically poorly addressed. Every bride actually has her own opinion on what how a Maid of Honor should act. However, communicating these ideas are difficult.
The Main of Honor is commonly perceived as a ceremonial figure that walks behind the bride down the aisle before the bridesmaids. In another light, the Maid of Honor can act, as the one that will help calm a nervous bride, helps in sending out invitations, making sure the registry is properly sent, gives tips on the how the wedding gown should look like and acts as the manager of the bridesmaids.
The Maid of Honor can also host the bridal shower or the bachelorette party. To sum it up, the Maid of Honor is the bride’s closest friend or ally in preparing for the wedding and will always be there during times of need and frustration.
The following are certain etiquette in choosing a Maid of Honor to help minimize stress and maximize pleasure.
The Maid of Honor does not have to be a family member.
It is not a requirement to make a sister or a female cousin the Maid of Honor. A best friend who has been there through thick and thin will likely deserve this distinction.
The bride should instruct the Maid of Honor on her responsibilities.
Brides should communicate what they expect from the Maid of Honor such as making a speech during the reception. Open communication between the two should happen frequently.
Choosing more than one Maid of Honor is not illegal.
The bride should make sure that Maids of Honor have different responsibilities in order to avoid jealousy between them.
The Maid of Honor needs to attend all-wedding activities such as showers and parties for the bride. She will also be tasked to plan and be financially responsible for any bachelorette party and assist in organizing invitations and always be open for favors.
The Maid of Honor’s emotional support is one her integral responsibilities. As the so-called “maid” she is expected to give her full attention to the bride during the wedding day. She should also make sure that the bride is looking almost perfect before they troop down the aisle and constantly check on her condition during the middle and end of the ceremonies up until the start of the reception.
Upon choosing the Maid of Honor, she should be treated out by the bride to a nice dinner or spa to make her feel she is a very important part of the wedding. The Maid of Honor could have a dress designed differently from the other bridesmaids to make her stand out in the entourage.
Etiquette also dictates that the Maid of Honor will wear the groom’s ring on her finger in the absence of a ring bearer. She is also part of the group that will decorate the bridal car and help the bride in wearing the bridal dress.
A wedding ceremony adhered to certain etiquette to make the occasion flow seamlessly and orderly.
- In a semi-private wedding, groomsmen and bridesmaids are given certain responsibilities in helping the bride and groom during the wedding day.
- The bridesmaids should be younger than the bride and their dresses should match. Bridesmaid dresses can include more ornaments and should be composed of light and graceful material. Flowers should functions as the chief decoration.
- The wedding dress should be simple but can be attached with small jewels or ornaments. The garland and veil should be the most eye-catching.
- Bridesmaids should stay at the bride’s left side during the actual wedding ceremony. The first bridesmaid should hold the bouquet and gloves.
- Bridesmaids can be positioned from the shortest to the tallest in order to be symmetrical. A bridesmaid and groomsman with similar height can be paired.
- The groomsmen are assigned to guide the clergyman and then show him to the couple. The groomsmen should stand at the groom’s right side during the wedding ceremony.
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Wedding Etiquette: Cash Bar Wedding Parties
Open bar wedding party has been gaining popularity these days because more and more couples have been celebrating an evening wedding. With open bar, guests are free to order any brand of drink to their liking without limit as to how many shots or glasses they should order.
However, some couples with limited budget see cash bar as the best option for them. As opposed to open bar, guests must pay for every drink that they order in a cash bar wedding party. The newly weds won't be held liable for a guest's non-payment of a drink ordered. Guests should leave a bill for a drink the way a customer does when he ordered a drink in a local bar.
If you, a groom or bride-to-be, are concerned with wedding etiquette, wedding etiquette specialists will tell you not to go for a cash bar. If you would be graded for a wedding etiquette examination, saying yes to a cash bar has a grade of zero.
For specialists on wedding etiquette, cash bar is not an option even for couples who are tight on a budget. Since cash bar violates wedding etiquette, wedding etiquette specialists say that you should expect snide remarks from your guests if you pursue a cash bar wedding party. You might even hear them saying things like, the newly wed do not know wedding etiquette, or if they couldn't afford an open bar, they shouldn't have hosted a cocktail party at all and they should have stayed with a sit down dinner.
Guests who would make such a remark obviously are unaware of wedding etiquette too. But just the same, we cannot silence them for making such remarks.
Some wedding etiquette books even say that if you are thinking of a cash bar night party, make a pass for a night party; it's better not to have a night party at all if it would be a cash bar.
- Solution to Cash Bar
There is a solution though to cash bar. According to books on wedding etiquette, you can implement the semi-open bar. With this strategy, you won't worry about violating wedding etiquette through cash bar and you won't need a big budget to throw an open bar wedding party.
Wedding etiquette specialists would recommend you to open bar the first two drinks to your wedding guests and cash bar the ordered drinks thereafter.
Two drinks are considered socially acceptable standards for social drinking. In implementing the semi open, semi cash bar wedding party, you have satisfied the needs of guests expecting you to practice wedding etiquette while at the same time you have satisfied yourself for not spending too much.
Many couples who are not limited on a budget implement the two-drink open bar and cash bar afterwards cocktail or evening wedding party. This is to avoid excessive drinking from wedding guests, and for wedding guests to maintain social composure.
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Wedding Etiquette Book
A wedding etiquette book will usually extend the pages so as to meet the quota of its publishers. It is a good thing, however, to have at least a guideline of what a reader can expect from a wedding etiquette book.
Enumerated and listed below are the topics and subjects that one will expect from reading a wedding etiquette book. A good wedding etiquette book will usually cover the topics or subjects listed below.
This article desires to help readers or couples who want to know what to expect in a wedding etiquette book. Basic reading of the topics or subjects listed below will give a reader a simple guide to go through while searching for the necessities in weddings.
This article was written based from a proper and orderly wedding etiquette set in the American way and is sourced from a wedding etiquette book. Readers are encouraged to use teh article as a sort of guide to help and aid with the decision, with the family, and who will supposedly pay for what in a wedding setting.
1. Expenses Of The Bride
A good wedding etiquette book must list the Groom's Wedding Band as one of the expenses to be handled by the bride. Aside from this, a good wedding etiquette book will also handle the gifts for the attendants, also the accommodation for out of town attendants. A good wedding etiquette book will also list the wedding gift for the groom as necessary expense of the bride.
2. Expenses Of The Groom
A good wedding etiquette book must list the bride's engagement ring and the wedding band as an expense by the groom. Also the expense for the honeymoon, the wedding gift needed for the bride is listed as an expense by the groom.
The groom will also handle the expense for the marriage license, the gifts for the groom's men, the accommodation for the out of town groom's men, and the flowers needed for the bride.
A good wedding etiquette book will also list the corsages needed for mothers, and the special ladies. Also the groom will cover the expense for the boutonnieres for the men in the wedding parties. Also, accessories for the men that are in the wedding party as well as the fee for the clergy person or the judge must be noted by a good wedding etiquette book.
3. Expenses By the Bride's Family
A good wedding etiquette book will also include the expenses handled by the bride's family. The bride's family will most usually handle the cost of the wedding reception and ceremony. The bride's wedding attire as well as all the invitations, the announcements and thank you notes are handled by the bride's family. The bride's family will also handle the mailing costs of all the invitations, announcements and thank you notes.
A good wedding etiquette book will also handle the expense for the photographer and videographer. A good wedding etiquette book will also handle the expense of the flowers and accessories for the bridesmaids, the flower girls, and the ring bearers.
Lastly, a good wedding etiquette book will handle the expense of all transportation for the bridal party on the wedding day from the ceremony to the reception. All the gratuities for all the services are also included by a good wedding etiquette book. A bride's family will also handle the expenses for the luncheon of the bridesmaid.
4. Expenses By The Groom's Family
A good wedding etiquette book will also state that the groom's family will handle the clothing for the actual wedding, the travel and lodging expense for the wedding, the rehearsal dinner and also the wedding gift for the newlyweds.
5. Expenses By The maid Or Matron Of Honor
A good wedding etiquette book will handle the cost of the dress and the other attire. The Maid of Honor will also handle the expense of the travel expenses of the wedding.
A good wedding etiquette book will handle the one shower gift aside from the one wedding gift. The Maid of Honor will also share the cost for the bridal shower.
6. Expenses By The Bridesmaids
A good wedding etiquette book will note that when a bridesmaid is below sixteen years old, she is not expected to help with the cost of the wedding.
Usually, the bridesmaids will cover the expense for their own dresses and the other attire, the travel expenses, and the only one shower gift and the one wedding gift. The bridesmaids will likewise share the expense for the bridal shower with the maid of honor.
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